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Microsoft Internet Explorer vs. Firefox brief comparison guide
This is a brief, slightly demented comparison guide of the features of the MSIE for Windows and Friefox web browsers to show you just how great Microsoft Internet Explorer really is. Consult a doctor before reading. Use of this list for any real use would be stupid. If you think this list is supposed to be serious or logical in any way then you are the one who is insane.
Comparison MSIE Firefox
Controlled by a tyrannical corporation that abuses its monopoly. YES NO
Embodies pure evil YES NO
For the "benefit of the consumer" is pre-installed on every currently shipping version of MS-Windows and the uninstall option has been removed.  YES NO
"Integrated" In to the OS so you can not have multiple versions of the web browser on the same computer. YES NO
Comes with the number one e-mail program for spreading viruses. YES NO
Bundled with active X security hole. YES NO
Will happily trash your hard drive if you install it. YES NO
Takes your entire OS with it when it crashes. YES NO
Sexually molests .dll files on your computer. YES NO
Causes system resource leaks. YES NO
Source code is safely locked away so nobody can see what is in it. YES NO
Active Advertising all over the place. YES NO
Automatic BS receiver. YES NO
Looks cool when set on fire. YES NO
Latest version refuses to run under older versions of Windows YES NO
Browse your hard drive as a retarded web page. YES NO
Lacks versions for the bazillion other operating systems out there besides Windows. YES NO
Lacks a cool mascot. YES NO
Blatantly ignores web standards. YES NO
Installed with and required by just about every Windows application out there. YES NO
Breeds inside Windows PCs. When they mature a big slimy green hideous alien like thing bursts out of your CD-ROM drive. YES NO
If stupidity could be harvested as a fuel, the browser would power the entire planet for 1000 years. YES NO
Without warning drops support for commonly used standards such as browser plug-ins. YES NO
Replaces your desktop shell with itself for no humanly explainable reason. YES NO
Written by demons from hell. YES NO
When translated to English the EULA contains the phrase "all your soul are belong to us". YES NO
Has been declared an environmental hazard by the EPA. YES NO
Multiplies when fed after midnight. YES NO
Without warning will suddenly start translating your web pages in to Latin. YES Requires plug-in
Its primary food source is human brains. YES NO
Can be used to induce vomiting. YES Minimal support
CD makes a good coaster. YES NO
Inspires states to sue the company that makes it. YES NO
EULA forbids running the browser under any OS other than what it was designed for. YES NO
Is now the mandatory standard browser of the planet Earth. YES NO
Uninstalling this browser is forbidden by law. YES NO
Has mostly ceased development. YES NO
The web the way Bill wants it. (tm) YES NO
Brought to you by the fund to make Bill Gates ruler of the universe. YES NO
Its internals are fully undocumented. YES NO
Enables remote control over you PC by the company that makes the browser. YES NO
Support for M$-Bastardized HTML.  YES NO
Bill has complete control over your user settings from his bathroom. YES NO
Built-in auto destruct. YES Add-on is downloadable from the Internet.
Zombies love it! YES NO
Will be responsible for the end of the universe. YES NO
Attacks and disables foreign software. YES NO
Inspires dozens of hate web sites. YES NO

So there you have it, if you like pain or enjoy sacrificing animals then we definitely recommend downloading and installing Internet Explorer today! Remember, if you use Windows, you don't have a choice!

This page is a parody of a comparison page Microsoft used to have on their site.

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